Part 2 How to avoid Seclusion

Last time we talked about the seclusion of motherhood and the loneliness of being a special needs parent. So what can we do to combat that?

You already know the basic ones:

  • Call a friend
  • Ask for help
  • Go to reading time at the library
  • Meet mommy friends at the park
  • Join a parent- baby class
  • Go online and look for local mom groups

You get the Picture

Those are good ideas. If nothing else, they aren’t bad ones… In fact many lucky parents do find their tribe that way and that’s great.

But it’s not that easy for everyone. Your friend might live across the country. Asking for help isn’t as easy in society as it should be (be the change! Jump up when asked for help if you can), and if you’re like me small talk isn’t easy when you’re busy chasing your little tot.

So what are some smaller steps you can take to avoid talking to yourself for the next 18+ years?

Small steps

  • Smile at the other moms at the school bus stop or school pick up.
  • Try to pick the same time you go to a park or library every week and see if any other moms are going at that same time, smile.
  • Call a friend or friendly acquaintance from church and see if they want to get together for just 1 hour for a quick lunch, or dessert. Don’t commit to more than an hour because that could be scary 😉
  • Do you have a child that goes to speech, occupational therapy, ABA, or even dance practice? Strike up small talk with other parents at drop off or pick up. Compliment their kid, parents like that.

Have I tried these?

Yep! I don’t get together regularly with the other parents from my kid’s bus stop, but we greet each other every school morning, and ask how a kid is if they weren’t there the day before. Nothing monumental but it’s a small mommy tribe forming.

I tried the same time for the library and park… I made contact, got numbers, did follow up play dates… It didn’t work out, “It’s not you, it’s me.” Luckily it was cold/flu season and my kid got a cold ✌️

We’ve got a few play dates out of meeting up at parks with kids that go to the same ABA therapy. It’s been fun so far, and I don’t mind doing it again.

The 1 hour mommy lunch date has been a game changer! I get out of the house usually once a week. I get to talk to another grown up beside my husband (no offense 😉), and it’s usually only an hour so my kids and husband don’t go crazy with me being gone too long 😜

Doing 1 or 2 of these might not seem like much, but over time they can make a big difference in finding your mommy tribe, or finding just one mommy friend if that’s what you are looking for. Heck, it might be a big deal for that other mom you smile at.

So what do you do to avoid feeling the lonely parenting blues? What do you do to help other mommies get out and socialize?

Don’t forget to comment, like and share ✌️

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